:: It is not within me to be silent ::
Semi-regular filthy-minded misogynist rants coupled with philosophical treastises into the nature or gender politics. Though I'm not always right, I'm very rarely wrong.
Thursday, November 06, 2003 ::
I would like to think I'm pretty normal. I have some odd things here and there about me, like my idiot savant theme song thing, but even my fetishes are pretty normal. Why bring this up?
I was at a bar with my friend Kenny, when a HOT woman walked by to go to the bathroom. I smiled at her and she smiled back.
Me: Damn, she was fine, bro! (Actually, I said Wowsers, that girl was certainly very fine, eh chap?)
Ken: Yeah.
Me: She had a boomin ass, great legs, big rack, a nice smile and pretty eyes! She was perfect.
Ken: She had nice feet.
Me: What the fuck?
Okay, far be it from me to judge the fetishes of others, but seriously, feet? Come on! Here's a short list of my fetishes:
1. When a woman wears a skirt with no panties. HOT! The Story of O book that Marci the Wonder Amazon got me for my birthday starts off with O in the back of a taxi, and her master telling her to slide her panties off. HOT! I've done that to girlfriends before, when I'm driving, asking them to open the vault. Is there anything better? I don't think so. And to go to a restaurant or just out together, with her sans the covering below, so that I have full access. The stuff dreams are made of.
2. Kissing: Yeah, okay, this is not that surprising a fetish but hells yes, I can do this for hours and just get hotter and hotter.
3. Dominating: Yeah. Nuff said.
4. Showers, tubs, lakes, kiddie pools, the fountain at the park, a sauna, whatever. Me, her, water, I'm good. I love this, when a girl is straight out of the shower, or when we're together in the shower, gets my motor running. Or pumping. Throbbing? Heheh, I said throb.
5. Long hair: Running my fingers through it, grabbing it, pulling it. Yeah. Oh yeah. Call me crazy, but long hair on a woman is one of the best things ever.
6. Garter belts and hose. I think I had a gentle talk with my libido while watching the movie Chicago. There were so many garter belts that I thought I'd overheat. This movie is awesome, for those who haven't seen it, and it has so many half-clothed women there that Paul was beginning to have issues.
7. Swallowing. *ahem* I've mentioned this, and I will stick by it till the day I die.
8. A nice, round posterior. A round rack helps, too.
I obviously wasn't very clear here, but my question was, why are feet erotic? I can explain why all of my fetishes exist and why I find them endlessly erotic, but ask someone about feet, and they have NO IDEA. For real. Daintiness? Bigness? What do you look for in nice feet? Toes?
Anyway, I have sucked toes. It's called shrimping, and I did it with the girl I dated at work, because she loved it. I didn't find it that gross, but honestly, it did nothing for me. She LOVED it, though, and any key to the most wonderful of places, the honeypot, is a key that I shall use, regardless of whether it turns me on or not. If a girl that I loved wanted me to dress up like a clown and spank her with a dead fish because it would turn her on more than anything else, someone grab me a red nose and some makeup. Any way that I can turn a woman on, I will try.
Fetishes are things that turn you on, right? Not like an obsession? I mean, I can live without any of these on a woman, if my only obsession with women being that they're beautiful, smart and funny. But I like women to do and have these things. They make me happy and excited. None of these are necessary for my sexual gratification, but they sure do help.
It's with a sad heart that I say that Stacey the Sinner, formerly located at http://www.staceythesinner.blogspot.com, is no longer blogging. Here is what she had to say: sorry to say it, but i disabled my blog. there just isnt any time for me to
post like i had been, and things here just are NOT that interesting. anyway, at some point in the future i may blog again, so you will of course be the first to know. and im still checking my email when my fuzzy little blond brain remembers, so keep on writing me if you're of a mind to!
Stacey rocked, she was one of the first peopleboredinterested enough to visit my blog. So, I raise a toast to her. To Stacey! You rock, sweetness!
Where were these handbooks when I was in school? WEll, now that I think about it, I didn't really need it. Everything I know I learned from porno
In September, a British government-funded charity, Family Planning Association, distributed a cartoon booklet teaching the joys of masturbation to a target audience of 9- to 11-year-old girls.
:: Paul 5:12:00 PM [+] ::
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